Art. 11. As the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion; as it has in itself no character of enmity against the laws, religion, or tranquillity, of Mussulmen; and, as the said States never entered into any war, or act of hostility against any Mahometan nation, it is declared by the parties, that no pretext arising from religious opinions, shall ever produce an interruption of the harmony existing between the two countries.
From: The Treaty of Peace and Friendship between the United States and the Bey and Subjects of Tripoli of Barbary, Article 11. This treaty, authored by American diplomat Joel Barlow in 1796, was sent to the floor of the Senate, June 7, 1797, where it was read aloud in its entirety and unanimously approved. John Adams, having seen the treaty, signed it and proudly proclaimed it to the Nation.
The Jig Is Up!!!
We've been found out. I guess we'll have to pack it up and abandon the "completely valid and reliable " blog which has brought me so much joy over the past two or three months.
NOT
NOT
America’s Most Overrated President
Over the course of the last eight and a half months, my United States History teacher has attempted to force his flamingly libertarian worldview down the throats of his bright-eyed and bushy-tailed students. His overzealous machinations have proved somewhat effective in honing our somewhat underdeveloped rationale, however; his curriculum has been fraught from the get-go with efforts to defame and demonize some of the most beloved and influential characters in the history of this great country. For example: Thomas Jefferson, drafter of the Declaration of Independence, Founder of the University of Virginia, benefactor of the Library of Congress, and the brains behind the Louisiana Purchase and subsequent Lewis and Clarke expedition has come under attack by our supposedly arbitrary instructor on numerous occasions. The reason given for these defamations is Jefferson’s reduction of the navy in his term in office, and an apparent “zipper problem” when it came to one of his slaves. All previous affronts aside, our ersatz historian crossed the line of no return recently when he labeled John F. Kennedy the “second most overrated president in U.S. history (Jefferson being the first).” This declaration was followed by an insinuation that “catching a bullet in Dallas” was the only reason Kennedy achieved the popularity he did. Apart from casting absolute moral judgments on an era HE WAS NOT ALIVE TO SEE, I believe that my teacher has forgotten to evaluate the course one very important presidency in recent history. I am talking, of course, about America’s Most Overrated President: Ronald Reagan.
The Religious Right has hailed Reagan as some paragon of virtuous leadership and conservative government without ever abjectly examining the policies of said “fallen saint.” The following is a brief summary and examination of Reagan’s two terms as president of the United States (1980-1989).
Let’s Get This Party Started: Reagan was cast in a positive light in the first few months of his presidency by a series of events completely unrelated to anything he, personally, had done: 1) On inauguration day, 1980, Iran released 52 U.S. hostages thanks to months of intense bargaining by Reagan’s successor. 2) Two months after being sworn in, a lone gunman fired on the president in full view of the media, the would be assassin sent Reagan to the hospital, and his approval rating through the roof. One may be so bold as to say that catching a bullet was the best thing that could have happened to Reagan to cement his demigod status among the wealthy white males of this country.
Reaganomics: Supply-Side economics (christened “Reaganomics”) were imposed on the American people with the intention of stimulating investment by the upper class. Said intentions never came to fruition, instead the economy was worse off when Regan left the white house then it had been since World War I. Reaganomics largely consisted of the following:
- Expanded upper class wealth with a minimal trickle-down of invested capital.
- Tax cuts for upper income earners.
- Budget cuts in the area of $40 Billion from food stamps, Student loans, and public transportation.
- Dramatically increased military spending (hence escalating the Cold War).
Deregulation: Reagan reduced restrictions on many business-oriented policies in an attempt to “stimulate American business.” Deregulation reduced restrictions on the following:
-Mergers and takeovers by big corporations (laying the framework for the Enrons and WorldComs of the twenty first century).
- Environmental protection laws (part o the “let’s shaft the ecosystem” plan)
- Vehicle emissions (making An Inconvenient Truth possible)
- Automobile safety (Seatbelts are for wimps anyway)
- Opened up federal lands and waters for coal mining, oil drilling, and timber production (i.e. clear cutting, strip mining, oil rigging, and Butte, Montana)
1982: in Reagan’s second year as leader of the free world the U.S. economy hit the worst recession since the 1930s:
-Unemployment reached 11%
- The income gap between yuppies (young, urban professionals) and the middle ad lower classes widened.
- The status of the middle class stagnated, then declined, and continued to do so until Bill Clinton moved into the White House.
Justice League: Reagan appointed Sandra Day O’Connor, the first female justice in the position, to the Supreme Court. She, along with three other Reagan-appointed justices, restricted affirmative action laws (implemented to prevent racism/sexism in the workplace) and Roe vs. Wade (the pro-choice case).
1984: Reagan won a second term in office in ’84. Voter returns showed that 2/3 of white males voted for Reagan. As a matter of fact, the only two groups whose majority opposed Reagan were black people and poor people (those making less than $12,500 per year).
Spend Spend Spend: By the mid 1980s the Reagan administration:
-Reported deficits of over $200 Billion per year.
-Tripled the national debt from $90 Billion to around $2.7 Trillion
-Increased consumption of foreign-made goods and decreased investment via ineffective tax cuts.
- Ballooned the U.S. trade deficit to $150 Billion per year (for a grand total of $1 trillion trade imbalance in the 1980s).
-Increased foreign ownership of U.S. land.
-Broke up unions, reducing worker’s wages.
-Made the U.S. a debtor nation for the first time since 1917.
Foreign Debacles: During his eight years as president, Reagan:
-Repeatedly referred to the U.S.S.R. as the “Evil Empire” and “the focus of evil in the modern world” thus establishing a Star Wars analogy which would continue with…
-Star Wars: Reagan Spent billions on a program to outfit U.S. satellites with lasers to “shoot down enemy missiles as they entered the stratosphere.” The project was never completed, nor successfully tested.
-Expanded the military budget from $171 Billion in 1981 to over $300 Billion in 1985.
-Supported Nicaraguan “Contra” guerillas fighting an insurgency against the leftist Sandinista government (congress eventually passed the Boland Amendment to prohibit said aid).
-Spent $5 Billion in support of an El Salvadoran anti-leftist government who hired death squads to kill around 40,000 civilians (including United States missionaries).
-Secretly sold anti-tank and cruise missiles to Iran during the Iran/Iraq war and passed the profits on to the Contras in violation of the Boland Amendment. Reagan denied involvement when the media exposed the illicit arms dealing.
I conclude, based on this evidence, that Reagan was, without a doubt, the worst U.S. president of the twentieth century. He single handedly wrecked the economy, tainted the environment, widened the class gap in American society, and made a mess of our standing in world politics. Yet, based on his charisma and tax cutting policies, the pro-Reagan majority wanted to repeal the two-term amendment implemented after FDR’s thirty-some terms as commander in chief. Needless to say, this man was THE most overrated president in the history of the United States of America.
The Religious Right has hailed Reagan as some paragon of virtuous leadership and conservative government without ever abjectly examining the policies of said “fallen saint.” The following is a brief summary and examination of Reagan’s two terms as president of the United States (1980-1989).
Let’s Get This Party Started: Reagan was cast in a positive light in the first few months of his presidency by a series of events completely unrelated to anything he, personally, had done: 1) On inauguration day, 1980, Iran released 52 U.S. hostages thanks to months of intense bargaining by Reagan’s successor. 2) Two months after being sworn in, a lone gunman fired on the president in full view of the media, the would be assassin sent Reagan to the hospital, and his approval rating through the roof. One may be so bold as to say that catching a bullet was the best thing that could have happened to Reagan to cement his demigod status among the wealthy white males of this country.
Reaganomics: Supply-Side economics (christened “Reaganomics”) were imposed on the American people with the intention of stimulating investment by the upper class. Said intentions never came to fruition, instead the economy was worse off when Regan left the white house then it had been since World War I. Reaganomics largely consisted of the following:
- Expanded upper class wealth with a minimal trickle-down of invested capital.
- Tax cuts for upper income earners.
- Budget cuts in the area of $40 Billion from food stamps, Student loans, and public transportation.
- Dramatically increased military spending (hence escalating the Cold War).
Deregulation: Reagan reduced restrictions on many business-oriented policies in an attempt to “stimulate American business.” Deregulation reduced restrictions on the following:
-Mergers and takeovers by big corporations (laying the framework for the Enrons and WorldComs of the twenty first century).
- Environmental protection laws (part o the “let’s shaft the ecosystem” plan)
- Vehicle emissions (making An Inconvenient Truth possible)
- Automobile safety (Seatbelts are for wimps anyway)
- Opened up federal lands and waters for coal mining, oil drilling, and timber production (i.e. clear cutting, strip mining, oil rigging, and Butte, Montana)
1982: in Reagan’s second year as leader of the free world the U.S. economy hit the worst recession since the 1930s:
-Unemployment reached 11%
- The income gap between yuppies (young, urban professionals) and the middle ad lower classes widened.
- The status of the middle class stagnated, then declined, and continued to do so until Bill Clinton moved into the White House.
Justice League: Reagan appointed Sandra Day O’Connor, the first female justice in the position, to the Supreme Court. She, along with three other Reagan-appointed justices, restricted affirmative action laws (implemented to prevent racism/sexism in the workplace) and Roe vs. Wade (the pro-choice case).
1984: Reagan won a second term in office in ’84. Voter returns showed that 2/3 of white males voted for Reagan. As a matter of fact, the only two groups whose majority opposed Reagan were black people and poor people (those making less than $12,500 per year).
Spend Spend Spend: By the mid 1980s the Reagan administration:
-Reported deficits of over $200 Billion per year.
-Tripled the national debt from $90 Billion to around $2.7 Trillion
-Increased consumption of foreign-made goods and decreased investment via ineffective tax cuts.
- Ballooned the U.S. trade deficit to $150 Billion per year (for a grand total of $1 trillion trade imbalance in the 1980s).
-Increased foreign ownership of U.S. land.
-Broke up unions, reducing worker’s wages.
-Made the U.S. a debtor nation for the first time since 1917.
Foreign Debacles: During his eight years as president, Reagan:
-Repeatedly referred to the U.S.S.R. as the “Evil Empire” and “the focus of evil in the modern world” thus establishing a Star Wars analogy which would continue with…
-Star Wars: Reagan Spent billions on a program to outfit U.S. satellites with lasers to “shoot down enemy missiles as they entered the stratosphere.” The project was never completed, nor successfully tested.
-Expanded the military budget from $171 Billion in 1981 to over $300 Billion in 1985.
-Supported Nicaraguan “Contra” guerillas fighting an insurgency against the leftist Sandinista government (congress eventually passed the Boland Amendment to prohibit said aid).
-Spent $5 Billion in support of an El Salvadoran anti-leftist government who hired death squads to kill around 40,000 civilians (including United States missionaries).
-Secretly sold anti-tank and cruise missiles to Iran during the Iran/Iraq war and passed the profits on to the Contras in violation of the Boland Amendment. Reagan denied involvement when the media exposed the illicit arms dealing.
I conclude, based on this evidence, that Reagan was, without a doubt, the worst U.S. president of the twentieth century. He single handedly wrecked the economy, tainted the environment, widened the class gap in American society, and made a mess of our standing in world politics. Yet, based on his charisma and tax cutting policies, the pro-Reagan majority wanted to repeal the two-term amendment implemented after FDR’s thirty-some terms as commander in chief. Needless to say, this man was THE most overrated president in the history of the United States of America.
The Greatest People In The World
The title refers to the smartest, strongest, bravest, and hardest working people in the history of American immigrants (apart from the noble South/Central Americans who have given us, among other things, Ricky Martin, cheap and spicy foods with horribly pronounced names, and the song "Icky Thump"). I am talking, of course, about the Irish. Unlike those filthy philisophical Germans, the Irish came to America with one intent: "Get me a potato before I starve to death." Over the years, the Irish have become the lifeblood of the American dream.
Notes on the Irish:
St. Patrick: Contrary to popular belief, there never have been snakes in Ireland. St. Patrick's real miracles involved turning the rivers (and the beer) green in honor of himself and thus became the first Irishman to have a holiday that anyone cared about.
The IRA or "This week on British Isle Death Match:" Southern Ireland is Catholic in a big way, hence the staunchly Anglican and proud of it England has awlays born a little grudge toward its renegade neighbor. Enter occupation: Britain controls the northern end of the emerald isle much to the chagrin of the God-fearing Celts down south. In response to said occupation, the Irish Republican Army was formed to drive the Brits out and to form a unified Ireland where a man is free to do all the things an Irishman loves to do (mainly drink and complain about the british) despite the years of intense conflict, the political arena in Ireland has stabilized... for now...
Bono: The coolest philanthropist in the world happens to be Irish as well
Leperacahns: Don't exist, that would be stupid.
Guinness: Arthur Guinness started brewing ales initially in Leixlip, then at the St. James's Gate Brewery, Dublin, Ireland from 1759. He signed a 9,000 year lease at £45 per annum for the unused brewery.[3] Ten years later in 1769 Guinness exported their product for the first time, when six and a half barrels were shipped to England.
Although sometimes believed to have originated the stout style of beer, the first use of the word stout in relation to beer was in a letter in the Egerton Manuscript dated 1677, almost 50 years before Arthur Guinness was born. The first Guinness beers to use the term were Single Stout and Double Stout in the 1840s.[4]
Guinness brewed their last porter in 1974.
Notes on the Irish:
St. Patrick: Contrary to popular belief, there never have been snakes in Ireland. St. Patrick's real miracles involved turning the rivers (and the beer) green in honor of himself and thus became the first Irishman to have a holiday that anyone cared about.
The IRA or "This week on British Isle Death Match:" Southern Ireland is Catholic in a big way, hence the staunchly Anglican and proud of it England has awlays born a little grudge toward its renegade neighbor. Enter occupation: Britain controls the northern end of the emerald isle much to the chagrin of the God-fearing Celts down south. In response to said occupation, the Irish Republican Army was formed to drive the Brits out and to form a unified Ireland where a man is free to do all the things an Irishman loves to do (mainly drink and complain about the british) despite the years of intense conflict, the political arena in Ireland has stabilized... for now...
Bono: The coolest philanthropist in the world happens to be Irish as well
Leperacahns: Don't exist, that would be stupid.
Guinness: Arthur Guinness started brewing ales initially in Leixlip, then at the St. James's Gate Brewery, Dublin, Ireland from 1759. He signed a 9,000 year lease at £45 per annum for the unused brewery.[3] Ten years later in 1769 Guinness exported their product for the first time, when six and a half barrels were shipped to England.
Although sometimes believed to have originated the stout style of beer, the first use of the word stout in relation to beer was in a letter in the Egerton Manuscript dated 1677, almost 50 years before Arthur Guinness was born. The first Guinness beers to use the term were Single Stout and Double Stout in the 1840s.[4]
Guinness brewed their last porter in 1974.
Communist: The Other White Meat
Being a completely unbiased political observer, I never engage in any ad hominem whatsoever, with the exception of bashing those filthy, christ-hating, dirt eating commies who are the root of all evil in the modern world (as opposed to the jesuits, who ere the root of all evil in the world last year):
The shortest joke of all: communism.
'Tell me-is this already communism or will it be worse yet?'
A socialist, a capitalist and a communist agreed to meet. The socialist was late. 'Excuse me for being late, I was standing in a queue for sausages.'
'And what is a queue?' the capitalist asked.
'And what is a sausage?' the communist asked.
One man to another: 'Because of communism I will have a plane!'
'What do you need a plane for?'
'Well what if suddenly, say, flour is being given out in Kalug. Fly for half an hour--and I'm there!'
Alexander the Great, Caesar and Napoleon observed the army parade in Red Square, as honorable visitors.
'If I had Soviet tanks,' Alexander said, 'I would have been invincible!'
'If I had Soviet planes,' Caesar speaks, 'I could have conquered the whole world!'
'And if I had had the newspaper "The Truth",' Napoleon said, 'the world, even now, would not have found out about Waterloo!'
A lawyer, a surgeon, a builder and a communist were having an argument about whose trade was older.
'When God condemned Adam and Eve and exiled them from paradise,' said the lawyer, 'that was a legal act! So my profession is the oldest.'
'But please,' the surgeon said, 'before that God created Eve from Adam's rib. And that was a surgical operation! So my profession is older.'
'Forgive me,' said the builder, 'but a little bit earlier than that God created the world, he constructed it. So my profession is the oldest. Because as is known, there was only chaos before that.'
'And who created chaos?' the communist exclaimed triumphantly. 'Certainly, we communists!'
When did the first Soviet elections take place?
When God put Eve before Adam and said: 'Choose yourself a wife!'
The shortest joke of all: communism.
'Tell me-is this already communism or will it be worse yet?'
A socialist, a capitalist and a communist agreed to meet. The socialist was late. 'Excuse me for being late, I was standing in a queue for sausages.'
'And what is a queue?' the capitalist asked.
'And what is a sausage?' the communist asked.
One man to another: 'Because of communism I will have a plane!'
'What do you need a plane for?'
'Well what if suddenly, say, flour is being given out in Kalug. Fly for half an hour--and I'm there!'
Alexander the Great, Caesar and Napoleon observed the army parade in Red Square, as honorable visitors.
'If I had Soviet tanks,' Alexander said, 'I would have been invincible!'
'If I had Soviet planes,' Caesar speaks, 'I could have conquered the whole world!'
'And if I had had the newspaper "The Truth",' Napoleon said, 'the world, even now, would not have found out about Waterloo!'
A lawyer, a surgeon, a builder and a communist were having an argument about whose trade was older.
'When God condemned Adam and Eve and exiled them from paradise,' said the lawyer, 'that was a legal act! So my profession is the oldest.'
'But please,' the surgeon said, 'before that God created Eve from Adam's rib. And that was a surgical operation! So my profession is older.'
'Forgive me,' said the builder, 'but a little bit earlier than that God created the world, he constructed it. So my profession is the oldest. Because as is known, there was only chaos before that.'
'And who created chaos?' the communist exclaimed triumphantly. 'Certainly, we communists!'
When did the first Soviet elections take place?
When God put Eve before Adam and said: 'Choose yourself a wife!'
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